An Inconvenient Truth

It’s December, it’s DECEMBER (insert mild manic panic). I feel it’s a terrible cliché to keep telling each other how fast the year has flown by, followed by how busy we are and how in 2017 it’s all going to be different, better, more organised or even slower. Despite it feeling like we’re on autopilot speak, there is some truth to it, in part at least.

I have probably pencilled out the Etsy Party blog post around fifty times in my mind, asked myself when am I finally going to sit down and do it? Written it on daily to do lists, monthly goal sheets and mentally reprimanded myself for not having done it yet. I have made excuses to people and myself. Reassured them it will be posted soon, promised myself the same thing and still it’s DECEMBER and the party was in JUNE. Yes, I could have given up on the post altogether, but all those promises resound in my mind and heart, I am a person of my word even if it takes months to fulfill. Why, why, why has it taken so long to finally write the post and why am I now able to do it? Why today, why now... well, I think I admitted the truth to myself and therefore I am able to finally put pen to proverbial paper. Since June I have gone through a multitude of things, work wise and life wise. The most noteworthy happening within the personal confines of my mind, attitude and thought process. I’ve been encouraged to be more authentic, honest and to share more of the personal elements that impact me daily. That’s really tough, I am fiercely private when it comes to sadness, struggle, personal strife or anything that shows cracks. I can’t unpack it all here, but since June the ups and downs have been colossal. So... forgive me for writing about an event that took place in June... only in December. Insane, inexcusable... REAL. At the same time I don’t want you to read this and think “shame”, I don’t want to draw excessive attention to it either, but in the spirit of explaining and authenticity I thought I would elude to why it took close to five months to write the post. Instead of “poor me” I want to level with you, I want to tell you that we are all going through things that are difficult, but we are all so terrible about telling each other.

"For me it comes with the territory of running a business and blog that is focused on positivity and self-improvement. I therefore steer away from showing too many cracks... because of fear. 
I fear that if I am too honest people might think – “I won’t hire her, she can’t even manage her own life, how could she possibly help me?” Yes, some people might think that, I have to reassure myself that it’s okay."

What I have gleaned from a rocky road or two is more compassion for my clients and fellow humans. Since having several light bulb moments of my own I have been able to really widen my opinion and understanding and extend valuable advice based on personal experience.

I don’t want to mar the beautiful Etsy Party with inky tears or personal confessions, but I did want to just say sorry the post took so long, sorry work took so long, sorry. I’ve been climbing a very steep mountain and certain things just could not take priority. In itself the party was a lesson too. There were so many positive aspects, kind words, amazing people involved, but there was one element that led to a personal attack on my skills and the way I hosted the party. It’s always the case that we ignore the hundred or so positive things and nitpick and overthink the one negative aspect. This goes for all angles of life. I have since made peace with the person who brought negativity to the party and I think the result in the end was fairly positive. We can’t give up because of one negative comment or rant, we absolutely can’t. So... I hope in this confession and attempt at authenticity I can encourage you to keep going despite the crap, the negativity and the bad days.

Straight after this I am posting the happy, amazing Etsy Party photos in December from the party in June and you know what they are just as beautiful now as they were then. The smiles are still as bright, the decor still as pretty. The best thing is I didn’t give up and through that I get to share a brilliant event with you! Cue the confetti, wipe the tears away, celebrate life and cheers to surviving a long year that flew by and managed to kick our butts, but guess what... we didn’t give up. We survived... take that life! TAKE THAT!

Photo by BrightGirl.